I need support!

I just recenty found out that I have HPV. I have been married for 9 years and have had abnormal paps off and on since before I was married. My doctor recently did an HPV test after another abnormal pap. I have high risk HPV. To my knowledge I never had warts, just abnormal paps. I am shocked...amazed!!! We have been in a faithful marriage and for this to pop up is shocking. I feel so gross...I can't talk about it to anyone except my wonderful husband. The only thing he was afraid of is if developed into cancer yet. But at the same time...this desease is not what I want our conversations to be about. I do not want to talk to anyone about it...I am embarrased. I truly feel like a walking desease. I have a wonderful child and I am now afraid to even use the same toilet as her and I wash my hands a lot. This desease is consuming me...HELP! I had a colpsoy or whatever that test was and there is no sign of any warts or dysplasia. I have another test in 6 months...I have started to take vitamins and eat better. I know the key to this desease is the immune system. I need to get mine in shape. I have my daughters wedding to attend some day. When does this desease stop consuming your thoughts?? Please pass on any advise. THANKS!!!

Comments:

9/8/2003 7:37:12 PM -
I've only been diagnosed with it for a
short time and it consumed every damn
thought of mine for a long time but it
does get better. I still feel like
there is a dark cloud hanging over my
head but it's still better than it
was. At least you have a loving
family...it's much worse when you have
to go it alone...trust me.

9/8/2003 9:53:41 PM - tjwndt
i hear that last comment and it
resonates:) it sounds like you've has
this before you were married (abn
paps). the possiblity of passing to
daughter is approaching zero if she
didn't get it at birth and that
usually shows in throat or eyes, but
don't freak and start on her with
magnifying glass:) take her to dr if
anything shows but if they haven't
shown now.... also high risk (-16, -
18, et al) usually don't cause visible
warts on either sex, but your husband

9/8/2003 9:55:56 PM - tjwndt
is almost definitely infected by now.
he probably won't ever get warts, but
he'll likely always be a carrier.
there are a ton of good info sites
out there. start reading and don't
sweat it now. its way too late :)

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